Woman Thinking

Jokes, larks, japes and what-have-you. Plus Squiffy’s “alternative” advice column.

Get Real – Live Counterfactual News

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Scientist Says Chamomile Tea More Harmful Than Crack Cocaine

Herbal Tea

Chamomile tea may be more harmful than crack cocaine under certain circumstances. That’s the conclusion of a report released today by the UK’s prestigious Fichter Intitute.

Scientists Recreate Hitler’s Head From DNA, Attached to Body of Monkey


Scientists at the Gregor University of East London in South Africa have today announced that Hitler’s head has been successfully recreated from DNA fragments. The research has been hailed as a major scientific breakthrough, but animal rights organisations have condemned the work as “barbaric”.

Is Hungary About To Start World War III?


International tensions have risen to an all-time high this week, after the influential right-wing think tank, the Schweisser Institute of International Relations, released an emergency report claiming that the mid-European nation of Hungary may be about to start a nuclear war.

Squiffy’s Advice Column

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People whose lives I’ve completely sorted out so far:

I Can’t Take It Anymore


Ted writes:
“A number of years ago I was a sergeant in the British Army. However, unfortunately I was wounded while running away from a cat. I’ve always had a phobia of cats, and this one really gave me the creeps; it was white and furry and had weird eyes. While running I tripped and broke my arm in six places. The army discharged me, saying that I was a coward and of little use militarily … ”

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